Sense of humour failure

This one really should appear on The Urinal (as & when I get it up and running), but for now, its here. The original is/will be archived here, taken from Morning Newsbeat, a retail news website.

SkyNews reports that in the latest broadside against companies that make products that may be unhealthy for consumers, a minister at St. Mary the Virgin Church in Tetbury, Gloucestershire, in the UK, has published an article in the church magazine suggesting that McDonald’s is the work of the devil.

Rev. John Wright said that the article was meant as a joke, though he admitted that not everybody “got it.” He said, “I think there has been a bit of a sense of humour bypass by some people.”

Included in the article:

“And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so man would live a long and healthy life…But Satan created MacDonald’s (sic). And MacDonald’s brought forth the double cheeseburger. And MacDonald’s said to Man, ‘You want fries with that?’

“And Man said, ‘Supersize them’, and Man gained pounds.”

Anyone who’s ever read Spike Milligan’s old testament might find this vaguely familiar. I don’t know – it might even be a quote. The Sky News article which Morning Newsbeat mentions is here.

‘Planes, trains and flying automobiles

Early morning involved playing with new toys from Hamleys (for H at least) before venturing to the Science Museum in Kensington, where many an old ‘plane and automobile is housed.

Hannah was most taken with the basement floor – the children’s area with current interactive galleries such as the Garden and the Launch Pad. Wandered around other galleries: Digitopolis, Who am I?, Flight Lab, etc.

interacting at the science museum

Were back in Soho shortly after 5pm – Hannah’s tea-time. The restaurant we were intending to go to hadn’t yet opened so a quick alternative plan was made: the Stockpot on Old Compton Street. The Stockpot serves a wide selection of food, all of which has a feel of mum’s home-made cooking to it, at extremely reasonable prices, and served very promptly. I was apprehensive at trying a bottle of table wine @ only £7, but wasn’t disappointed in the least! The menu also caters well for children, with dessert items such as jelly and single cream. A meal for 3 and a half (including alcohol and desserts) came to circa £28… bargain! Will definitely be going there again.

dancing to the Angel Horns - live jazz- at Golden Square

We had some time to kill before going on to the Palladium Theatre to see
Chitty Chitty Bang Bang so detoured via Golden Square. We stumbled across Angel Horns, a jazz band of 5 saxaphonists, playing a free concert as part of the Jazz On The Streets – Midsummer Festival. Here, Hannah found a dancing pal in toddler Marie, and the two of them along with the band kept the rest of us most entertained.

Gayle & Hannah at the London Palladium Chitty the musical at the London Palladium

On to the Palladium theatre for the musical (for H’s benefit of course). It’s true – Chitty Chitty Bang Bang is magic and really can fly… See?

Spamleys

The skies opened as we were ready for hitting the shops – strolled from St James’ Park along the Mall, past Clarence House and St James’ Palace, touching on Pall Mall and up St James’s Street to Piccadilly. Meandering through the Burlington Arcade with its costumed Beadles, we then refreshed ourselves at my work opposite, before heading on to Regent Street.

at Hamleys after Hamleys

Next stop (by most popular request!) was Hamleys. Top of Hannah’s shopping list was a green fluffy crocodile and she happened to be in luck! Spent the best part of 2 hours exploring all 5 floors, not to mention the best part of 100 squid between us.

a London Eye pod County Hall from the London Eye

Loaded with Hamleys bags and a very happy 4 year old, we took the tube to Embankment, then crossed over the Thames to the South Bank on the new(ish) Hungerford Bridge. The skies were clear again in time for our flight on the London Eye at 4pm.

view of the Houses of Parliament from the London Eye view of Buckingham Palace & St James' Park from the Eye

It was an absolute joy to have sole use of Keith’s digital camera! Had great fun experimenting with panoramic shots (horizontal and vertical), black and white, portraits, etc etc. Took photos of such landmarks as the Houses of Parliament and the Big Ben clock tower, Westminster Abbey, Buckingham Palace and St James’ Park Lake, BT Tower, Charing Cross, Barbican, St Paul’s Cathedral, the Gherkin Tower, Oxo Tower, Battersea Power Station and County Hall.

Panorama from London Eye

Check out the web cam on the London Eye here.

How to end such a good day? By introducing H to a chicken shish taouk at Tooting’s own Amal Shawarma of course!

Fun packed, sun packed, my Sun-Pat

But less of the peanut butter adverts and more of my niece Hannah.

Gayle & Hannah in Green Park Hannah outside Buckingham Palace

Had a brilliant day today, starting at Green Park and Buckingham Palace early doors. Unfortunately, the changing of the guard was cancelled due to some garden party function, but a procession of mounted guards passed by anyway, to Hannah’s delight.

Hannah by St James' Park Lake feeding time at the park!

Saw a wide range of water fowl at St James’ Park, including swans, mandarin ducks, moorhens, geese and pelicans and enjoyed a picnic in the summer sun. Wandering along the lake towards Duck Island with the statuesque pelicans, we fed some of the ducks and ducklings and admired Duck Island House (below left) which has the appearance of being transported directly from a fairy tale.

 Feeding the waterfowl near Duck Island House Pelicans on Duck Island

Strolling across the Horse Guards Parade Ground to Whitehall, Hannah was amazed by the costumes of the sentry and mounted guards. There were masses of tourists on Whitehall, all trying to get their photos taken as close to the horses as possible: some pulling on the reins and patting them, and generally over-exciting the poor whinnying horses! It was then that the skies opened, albeit briefly.

Duck! duck! duck!

Gayle and Hankie’s summer trip

Four year old Hannah T from Harrogate is due to make her maiden voyage to the capital on Monday, and one household in Tooting is a bit giddy (nothing to do with a very generous delivery of Hambleton brewery ale from Keith’s dad). So far the agenda comprises: sausages, the London Eye, Hamleys, sausages, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, lollipops and sausages.